I just went to a mental hospital a fucking month ago got grounded because they needed to make sure I wouldn't do anything self-harming then sent me right up to my room to just rot and sob until the next morning yesterday I had a breakdown because my dad yelled at me for a mistake, and yelled at me for not liking the food they make. and all dad did was come up and say he would've let me cry if he didn't think it was a good moment to teach me a lesson that I need to control my emotions and not cry all the time. I bottled it up, he said I shouldn't do that, and now I'm letting it out, he doesn't want me to do that either cuz it's unhealthy. Why can't I do anything right? Why am I still grounded and only allowed to get thirty minutes a day to talk to people when I'm obviously suffering more without them? i don't get it they said I will when I'm older, but why? My birthday just passed about 7 or 8 days ago all I did on my birthday was get pancakes and then my friend went to dinner with me. my parents only gave me clothes and feminine things that I, as a trans person (which they know), dislike, and then complained when I didn't thank them for getting me something I didn't like one bit and they knew I wouldn't like. not to mention the fact my stepmom made me cry on my birthday by sending screenshots of texts between her and my mom that just made me feel terrible I might lie, but that's because if I don't then they never even look my way. I'm just an attention whore, but I just... Can't help it I've been abandoned so much, I don't want it to happen again. I don't want to be the person that's abandoning the other, either, but that seems like all they ever want me to do why I don't get it probably because I'm worthless and stupid but why....? why can't they go easy on me? they say they are, but they've been making me cry even more than they did before