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im trying so hard not to do this again but i fucking cant anymore. i cant even remember that last time i did it. ive been trying so hard lately but it just keeps getting worse and my brain is just like overflowing with shit ive been bottling up for as long as i can remember and its too much. i wanna do it so bad. i know that no one would care enough to notice or even check for it cause we're all just fucking drifting apart and i barely talk to anyone anymore but for some reason i still try. i dont have anyone to impress anymore. i dont get it. why cant i let myself do it. i want to so bad. why do i keep stopping myself. this is all just so scary and confusing and i feel so lost and alone and dont know how to stop myself from getting any worse. i feel like everythings just closing in on me.

• Published February 03, 2020, 00:00
• in Kiddie Pool
• in 7) vents/rants/screaming about shit
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