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i just really genuinely wish i wasn't here anymore. this shit is too much for me to handle and i don't know why i should even be trying at this point. nothing matters anymore. my body feels like its just gonna collapse and i'm just gonna give out. i'm so tired of everything. tired of feeling like this all the time, tired of feeling like i don't matter to anyone, tired of hiding my emotions, tired of getting attached to people so quickly, everything. that's the problem. i love too much. i get attached to everyone too fast. i can't stop caring about people and all it does is hurt cause the majority of them will never give a shit about me or any of my feelings towards them. no matter how much i try to make people see me and how much i love them, it never matters. it just gets ignored cause there's always that one fucking person who's more important than me. i don't think some people realize how shitty it feels to love somebody so god damn much that it just--actually makes your heart physically hurt you and cause actual pain---only for it to get brushed off like it doesn't exist. when will i be enough for them? what do i have to do for them to love me back so i can stop hurting all the damn time?
- Published July 21, 2019, 00:31
- in Kiddie Pool
- in 7) vents/rants/screaming about shit
- is not continuable by others
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