ok

i should have died like five time but i've never broken a bone.

one time i was at an appliance store and i jumped into a glass table like john cena style
another time i fell while rockclimbing and hit my head
i almost drowned because im the smartest human being on earth and thought "huh i cant swim?" JUMP IN THE 11 FEET PART OF THE POOL
fell asleep while in the bathtub... no comment
and my uncle threw me off a speedboat (and holy hecc apparently my cousins all laughed at me when i was drowning...)

• Published January 14, 2020, 19:15
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