:/
i have homework to do but i keep putting it off and uGh i told myself i was gonna do my homework when i got home but i cant bring myself to do anything anymore cause honestly whats the point i dont really know why i think i can get anywhere in life all i do is sit on my ass and do nothing im not going anywhere. i just give up on everything i try to do or procrastinate so much to the point where im stressing the fuck out trying to get assignments done that i hadnt started in the class its due like i even procrastinate stuff i wanna do. ive been wanting to draw and play minecraft and shit but i keep going "oh ill do it later" and then i dont cause im just tired and dont care anymore. i even procrastinate cutting. which isnt necessarily a bad thing but im just too over everything to even wanna move anymore. ive just been like itching to fucking tear my arms apart again but i cant do anything. i want to so bad. im not even trying to hold back even though it seems like it. im just to tired and worthless to be able to do anything. when is this shit gonna fucking end i was fine like a week ago and then some random bullshit got to me again and now i just wanna smash my face into a brick wall. i wanna hurt myself all the time again. i feel horrible and useless and like no one wants me around. i wanna be able to stop acting okay and happy every day. none of the smiling or laughing is real anymore i dont feel good
- Published December 16, 2019, 17:28
- in Kiddie Pool
- in 7) vents/rants/screaming about shit
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