Not about all the things ive said that they all throw in the trash- not about all the things ive done that they seem to disregard- not about all the tears that threaten to fall but cant because if I do then they will see that the person who keeps them standing is just as broken. THen they will see. That I only care for them. Maybe one day myself. But god I care about others so much.. That I forgot what hating myself felt like. And I cant seem to remember- But I cant seem to forget THAT EVERYTHING I TRY AND DO SERIOUSLY IS TAKEN AS A JOKE- BECAUSE ITS ALL I AM- A JOKE. SO I WONT CRY. NOT EVER. WHY?! BECAUSE ITS FUNNY. ALL OF IT IS FUNNY AND THATS FINE. thats fine. It will be fine. Ill keep smiling. Ill wait. Forever.