holyfuckingshitimpanickingholysHIT
ahaha so you know i’m a trans male right?? well i’m not actually sure about my gender rn and i’m pretty uncomfortable about it,, the most comfortable pronoun for me at the moment is he/him tho. so my mom just came in and had a talk with me and holy fucking shit. HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT. don’t worry, she wasn’t openly stating that she was homophobic or transphobic or any shit like that. it was about how she noticed i didn’t seem very comfortable with my body atm. i like half panicked because haha ya boi’s deep in the motherfucking closet. anyway it was mostly about how i kept commenting that i’m fat, and she was all “you know you’re beautiful even if you think you’re fat” (not exactly like that but i’m too busy panicking to remember properly)(also don’t worry she’s the best mom ever she definitely wasn’t being negative in any way) and i also told her that i didn't like my, ahem, boobs (yes i kind of hate them? you know?). and then she suddenly said after a short silence, “are you comfortable being a girl or a woman?” and i fuCKING FLIPPED MY SHIT (in my head. i managed to stay calm on the outside). i mumbled something like “yeah i guess” and she stared at me in a thoughtful way. holy SHIT GUYS MY MOTHER IS ONTO ME. and man in hindsight, that woulda been a perfect moment to sorta come out. the whole rest of the conversation i felt a little bit like crying. but then again i’m still unsure about my gender and i ain’t comin out till i’m sure. thankfully i know my mom and dad will still love me even if i’m trans and gay, but like. religion is in the way too. so i’m unsure and kind of calmer now?? anyway if you read this whole thing, thank you, and here’s a cookie. 🍪 summary of this vent/rant? i’m a coward and deep in the closet, and also mom and dad love me very much no matter what.
- Published August 10, 2020, 21:06
- in Kiddie Pool
- in album Featured
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